Text Message Conversation During Chapel

ME: “Alright tell me why the girl sitting next to me in chapel is wearing leather gloves, holding a sheet of bubble wrap, and forcing out laughter when the speaker says anything resembling a joke?”

OTHER: “Weird”

ME: “Really. She keeps clapping too. Like really loud leather glove claps. The really distracting kinds.”

ME: “The speaker just said shit. And now she’s clapping again.”

ME: “She is wearing leather gloves inside. But she has huge holes in her jeans. I’m really at a loss.”

ME: “She keeps picking up and setting down the bubble wrap. Looking at it like a fisherman looks at a fresh catch. Like she is looking forward to what she has in store for it. I may try to rescue it and set it free. I’m scared for the bubble wrap.”

OTHER: “Haha. Take a secret picture. I wanna see her.”

ME: “She looks normal. She just isn’t. I don’t think I could pull it off. Sry.”

OTHER: “Hmmm…. Oh well.”

The Good Times

One month after graduation and our traffic is way down but I couldn’t stand leaving a reader submitted headline collection as our final post.

Thank you to everyone who made the Northern Plight awesome. We’ll leave the site up here for a while as archives for anyone that wants to check it out. Read this post or this post to get a clearer picture of how and why we’ve ended.

Bernstein’s Farewell

Haha got ya! You were all just freaking out for a second, just admit it.

Alright, as sad as I am that Woodward has thrown in the satirical towel, I for one still have a semester (or two) left at NCU and definitely want to keep the Plight alive. As Woodward said, it has been an awesome ride and one of things I will cherish when I look back upon my years at NCU. With that being said, anyone who would like to contribute content for the Plight is more than welcome.(Now more than ever) I am not trying to replace Woodward, but having different perspectives is what has kept us fresh and new and I would like to keep it that way.

So if anyone is interested in writing for the Northern Plight, please send me an email a northernplight@gmail.com. Thanks so much for reading, it’s meant a lot to one inspiring writer and one future NCU Professor. (lol, totally kidding)

Spring Break!

We love you guys and girls but February has been a crazy month for us Plighters and we are going to take advantage of sitting around and doing nothing for a week. Don’t forget about us and check back when school starts up again in less than a week.

Poll: Why Did Your Car Get Booted?

36% – Forgot You Owned A Car

32%-You Heckled a Security Guard The Other Day When You Told Him He Had A Nice Asp

13%- Running Late For Class

12%- Thought Caffeine Addiction Was A Viable Handicap

4%- The Holy Spirit Told You To Park There

2%- Distracted By A Text Message, You Misread “Reserved For President” as “Reserved for Resident” 

1%-  Car Gave Off A “Suspicious Aura”